I'm at the airport getting ready to hop on a plane, heading back to Detroit (my hometown) for the week, but wanted to check in with you.

Hope you are having a wonderful holiday. We spent Christmas Eve with my Mom, sister, and a good friend that came in from out of town.

We laughed. We opened presents. And of course, we ate great food. Then we woke up in the morning and made even more great food for our Christmas brunch.

In the past, the day after so much great food, I'd be at the gym first thing in the morning sweating away my guilt.

Today I'm not at the gym. I probably won't even have time to workout at all. Talk about a drastic change! More on this later.

Indulge Now Bully Later

We tend to have this sometimes warped view of the holidays. While we're in the midst of the celebration--the food, the cocktails, the eggnog, the cookies, we say,"It's the holidays! Now's the time to indulge because this is part of the tradition of this time of year."

It's easy to feel that way in the fun of the moment. But later, though, that's when it catches up with us.

We pay the consequences by emotionally bullying ourselves over all of our bad decisions. We say to ourselves:

You shouldn't have had 3 glasses of wine!

I can't believe you went back for seconds (or thirds).

And we especially make ourselves pay for what we do when no one is looking. Like limiting our cookie intake to just two at the party, but then getting in the car and eating half a dozen more on the way home.

Well, today I wanted to catch you before you head full-on into bully mode.

Don't do it!

I want to give you a roadmap on how to get a handle if you are feeling a bit out of control over your holiday indulgence.

These 3 tips are perfect for you if you are ready to start losing weight AND taking really good care of yourself, both physically and mentally in the process.

3 Tips for Gaining Control After Holiday Indulgence

1. Today is a new day. Leave yesterday's indulgences in the past.

Decide right now not to bully yourself in 2013. Make 2013 your year of self-love!

You don't have to be mean to yourself. You don't have to pay for your "bad" decisions.

Whatever! The past is the past. Now, a week before the new year, is the BEST time ever to stop with the b.s. old, icky habits and to set new intentions.

What do you want 2013 to look like? What do you want it to feel like?

Make a list of the top 3 emotions you want 2013 to be all about:

1) ______________

2) ______________

3) ______________

Check in often and make sure your actions and thoughts align with these emotions. I'm willing to bet bullying, feeling guilty all the time, and bouncing back and forth between dieting and binging isn't going to be a match with this list.

2. Nurture yourself lean.

Yeah, you want to get lean. You want to look and feel amazing. Well, I'm gonna lay it on you. That doesn't happen through being Drill Sergeant Sally to yourself.

When you were a kid and your parents wanted you to do something, what were you more likely to respond to:

A) When they asked you lovingly, treated you with respect, and showed you why doing this thing would benefit you?

B) When they yelled at you and threatened to take away privileges if you didn't do it?

Duh, scenario A! Sure, you may have done what you were told in scenario B out of fear, but you probably rebelled eventually.

Your body (and your mind) work in the same way. They respond best when they are treated with love, kindness, and respect.

Decide that starting right now, you are going to nurture yourself lean.

If you love yoga and hate lifting weights, don't force yourself to lift weights. Give yourself permission to do whatever types of exercise feel best to you.

We don't dread workouts because we hate moving our bodies. We dread them because we're doing workouts that we hate!

Commit to filling your plate with foods that are both nourishing AND satisfying, meaning that they are healthy and they also taste really good.

Last week we had dinner at the very romantic and cozy Fig & Olive in West Hollywood (Halle Berry was at the table next to ours…yes, she is as radiant in person as she is onscreen!!) to celebrate my Mom's birthday and I ordered chicken tajine.

Oh my gosh, was it amazing! Moroccan spiced free range chicken served with fig, olive, apricot, carrot, zucchini, cipollini onion, tomato, toasted almonds and couscous with cilantro and harissa.

Food can be healthy AND taste good. This dish was so flavorful and so satisfying. I can't wait to try making it at home!

Whether you are at a restaurant or making meals at home, healthy food can be amazing.

And if you think, "Well I don't know how to cook like that," stop that limiting belief in its tracks. Maybe this is an opportunity to step up your game.

Take a cooking class. Hop over to Amazon and browse the thousands of cookbooks, read the reviews, find a few that get you excited about cooking and get into your kitchen.

When Ryan and I first met, all I knew how to make was spaghetti with meat sauce from a jar, macaroni and cheese from a box, and… yeah, that was pretty much it. If I can learn to cook, you can too!

3. Monitor your thoughts and words.

Awareness is one of the most powerful things we could ever have. Only when you start realizing what you are predominantly saying and thinking, can you then begin to change it.

Are you constantly complaining, making excuses, blaming others, or telling "your story"?

When I am working with clients 1-on-1, I only let them tell me their story of hardship once. Beyond that, it's not helpful.

Stop bringing your sadness, pain, frustration, and fear into your NOW.

I say this in the most loving way possible… You have a choice. If your life isn't the way you'd like it to be, you have to do something different.

Complaining and blaming doesn't change anything, it just makes you miserable (and perhaps also the people around you that have to listen to you complain all of the time).

If you just keep doing what you've been doing, you're saying that you actually do want your life to be this way. Complaining or not, actions speak louder than words.

If you truly wanted something different, you would start committing to making that happen.

You'd be willing to change. To step outside your comfort zone. To rearrange your schedule. To get resourceful.

Sometimes our old stories can become comfortable. They help us fit neatly into this box that says, this is who I am, feel sorry for me because this is what I have to put up with.

It's easier to say "I can't do it because ____" than it is to say, "I could do it, but I choose not to."

Enough with that! You are better than that. This is your life, start living it. Focus.

What do YOU want? I'm not asking you to tell me how things have been. I want to know WHAT YOU WANT.

What lights you up? What inspire you? What makes this precious GIFT of life that you have, worth living?

You have this amazing body, that breathes for you, that gives you the gift of taste, and touch, and sight, and sound.

Don't waste it. Don't worry it away. Embrace it!

Whew! This turned into quite a lot longer check in than I had planned...

So, bringing it all back full circle, over the past few days and weeks, yeah, I've eaten more than I usually do. More sugar, more carbs, just more food in general.

But in this grand, bigger picture that we've just laid out… it's not that big of a deal. I had a lot of fun, and today is a new day.

After years of stressing over my holiday indulgences, I've come to realize that it's mostly water weight anyway and besides, tomorrow I'll work out and get back to my routine. Not because I have to, but because I want to.

Beyond these 3 tips, if you'd like a more detailed roadmap, I'm offering $50 off ROCK Your Dream Body for the next 3 days.

Women are knocking it out of the park with this program, learning how to get the body of their dreams without the deprivation and self-sabotage of the past.

Learn more about the ROCK Your Dream Body Program here.

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