Lately I've been partaking in a lot of girl talk. I even had to increase my minutes on my phone plan to unlimited because I've been chatting so much. Heeeee…

Girl talk is healing for the soul. There's something about that heart-to-heart connection where you open a space for each other to be real, raw, unfiltered, and 100% who you are and where you are at in that moment.

In the past, I've done the other kind of girl talk. You know, the kind where you get on the phone with your bestie and gossip about this one and that one, judging their choices all the while measuring yourself against them in order to make yourself feel better about where you are at in your life. That kind of girl talk just sucks the life out of you. It feels good while you're chatting away boosting your ego, but then you hang up the phone and feel empty and icky.

No, I'm not willing to go there anymore. I've learned that lesson… more than once. I'd much rather hold space for my girlfriends to step into their awesomeness. To remind them of their power and strength and help them to see the big picture of all the things they are doing really well when they get lost in the weeds of overwhelm.

And then for them to do that for me. To shower me with unconditional love. To remind me of what I already know about myself and this incredible world that I get to be a part of. Girlfriends like this are priceless.

We all need girlfriends like this… but we don't all have them. Truth be told, it took me a while to find these ladies. You know why? Because my girlfriends are a reflection of me. I had to become the person that would attract these kinds of women into my life before they arrived. When I was down in the dumps all the time, complaining, comparing, and feeling sorry for myself… guess what kinds of girlfriends showed up?

When I started working on myself, changing my beliefs, my self-talk, and my outlook on life -- that's when the people I surrounded myself with started to change. Some fell away on their own, some I had to make a conscious decision to distance myself from, and then slowly but surely I began meeting more and more powerful women.

And that's a reason for me to pat myself on the back because I know that they wouldn't be showing up if I wasn't evolving into a better version of me.

When I look back to try to figure out how in the heck this evolution happened, I can see how parallel this journey is to the journey I took with learning how to nourish my body rather than starve it in order to get the body of my dreams.

And I realize this is true across the board for any kind of expansion of who you are. You want your dream body, you want a certain level of income, you want certain kinds of relationships, you want unconditional self-love… you follow a very similar path to get there.

The secret to success in any of these areas is this… finding your balance every step of the way. Balance. Not balance in the sense of all things being equal, but balance in having an awareness of where you are right now, appreciating where you are right now, and still being eager for more.

The key to finding better relationships isn't in looking around and dissing all the relationships you currently have. Nope! That'll just bring you more of all of that.

The key is in looking at your current relationships and appreciating whatever you can about them right now. Pick and choose. Ignore the stuff you dislike, accept people for who they are and where they are, and appreciate whatever parts of them that you can.

Make lists of all the qualities in the people around you that you truly respect and adore. Appreciate everything that you can so that you feel happy with where you are now, while on your way to where you want to go.

This is exactly what I did with my body too. I appreciated every little detail I could about the body I had while I was on my way to the body I dreamed of.

Happy where I'm at, eager for more. Balanced where I am at, eager for more. Aware of what I don't want, but even more aware of what I DO want, ready for more.

It sounds like a lot of woo-woo mindset mumbo jumbo, but it's not just about tricking yourself into being happy with what you have. It's not wrong to want more than what you have. But if you get stuck cycling in your garbage negative talk where all you see is what you dislike, then you aren't open to letting the good in.

Whether that is relationships, the body of your dreams, or even the job of your dreams.

Think about it. If you're down in the dumps and a friend invites you out to a fun party, you'd probably rather just stay home in your jammies and have a House of Cards Season 2 marathon with a giant bowl of popcorn or pint of Ben & Jerry's. How are you going to meet new inspiring people doing that?

But… if you are doing the work, appreciating everything you can about your life right now, being happy right now… and that friend calls you up, you're going to be ready for a new adventure! You're going to go to that party and chat people up and be 100% YOU. They are going to love you and want more of you. Then you'll get more invites and feel more connection and love pouring into and out of you. You'll come home that night feeling like you had a really great experience.

What do you want? Really, what do you WANT? Ask yourself this and then get to work on putting that out into the world and you might just knock your own socks off on how incredible life can be when you start practicing what you want to receive.

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